나르시시즘에 대한 이해: 안정된 자존감을 위한 명확한 정체성의 중요성

명확한 정체성은 안정적인 자존감으로 이어지기 때문에 나르시시스트는 그런 자신감으로 개인을 조종하기 어렵습니다.

### 나르시시즘에 대한 이해 안정된 정체성의 중요성과 그것이 인간관계와 사회에 미치는 영향
* 😌 자신의 강점과 약점을 명확히 인식하는 등 안정적인 정체성을 갖는 것은 **자존감을 안정적으로 유지하는 데 매우 중요**합니다.
* 🎭 명확한 정체성이 없는 나르시시스트는 불안정한 자존감을 높이기 위해 **외적인 성공에 의존**하기 때문에 조작적인 행동과 정서적 불안정을 초래합니다.
* 🔒 자아감이 강한 사람은 **자기애적 조작과 통제에 덜 취약**합니다.
* 👨 불건전한 자기애는 **아동 학대, 부모와 자녀 간의 갈등, 데이트 폭력, 직장 내 괴롭힘, 온라인 폭력** 등 다양한 사회 문제와 관련이 있는 경우가 많습니다.
* 🌟 많은 사람들이 나르시시즘을 자기애나 자존감 같은 긍정적인 특성만 연상하는 경향이 있지만, **실제로는 건강한 나르시시즘부터 병적인 나르시시즘까지 다양한 스펙트럼**이 존재합니다.
* 💡 건강한 나르시시즘은 자신을 소중히 여기고 자신의 능력을 믿으며 **집착하거나 타인에게 해를 끼치지 않고 성공을 추구**하는 것을 포함합니다.
* 🌱 건강한 자기애를 가진 사람은 **위대한 성취를 꿈꾸고, 관심과 칭찬을 갈망**하며, **적절한 자제력을 유지**하면서 성공을 위해 노력할 수 있습니다.

However, when you meet someone like this narcissist, you don't easily fall into their manipulation. Narcissists find it difficult to deal with people like that. Narcissists are most uncomfortable and have a hard time with individuals who have stable self-esteem. But the reason is that ultimately, stable self-esteem comes from a stable and firm identity. So, what does it mean to have a stable identity? It means having the ability to perceive oneself as a very individual existence. Therefore, there is a clear distinction between myself and others. My strengths are my strengths, and my issues are my issues. What the other person does well is their accomplishment, and what they do wrong is their mistake. People with clear boundaries like this are talking about having a clear identity. But why is having such a clear identity important for stable self-esteem? Ultimately, it's because I am...

When you are clear about the good and bad parts of yourself, you can be less influenced by the environment. For example, if we are doing well environmentally, achieving good results through hard work, and receiving rewards to some extent, it naturally feels good. It's like, I've worked so hard and achieved this much. I'm doing well. You can appreciate yourself positively, but just because external situations are going well doesn't mean you should think, I'm the best, no one can follow me, I'm perfect. This is because even though things are going well in the environment, you are still aware of your shortcomings and weaknesses. Conversely, even if you are struggling in some external aspects, putting in effort may not lead to results.

When we experience failures, it is natural for our confidence to decrease and our self-esteem to be affected. Because we are human, that's how it is. However, just because some environmental aspects are not going well doesn't mean I am truly useless, I am really a worthless person. I don't think highly of myself to that extent. Why? Because having a clear identity, being aware of my weaknesses, and also recognizing my good qualities clearly, allows for stable self-esteem. That's why having a clear identity can lead to stable self-esteem. Narcissists, on the other hand, need external success because their identity itself is unclear. Therefore, self-esteem, which may seem very high externally, especially in terms of overestimation, can appear as arrogance and thinking highly of oneself, but the most important thing inside is unstable self-esteem and.

So, without any external praise or recognition of identity, self-esteem can plummet dramatically. Therefore, one may show emotional responses such as anger or depression. However, when a narcissist meets someone with a clear sense of identity, that person who has a clear sense of identity can recognize not only themselves but also others as integrated individuals with both strengths and weaknesses. That's why when observing a narcissist, it can be very uncomfortable because behind the image that the narcissist wants to show outwardly, there are eyes that can see the integrated parts of that person. This can be very uncomfortable for narcissists because what they fear the most is the situation where the other person sees their flaws, as they themselves do not want to acknowledge those flaws.

People who are confident about their own or their partner's identity often feel uncomfortable. These individuals are very aware of their strengths and weaknesses, so they are not easily manipulated by narcissistic control. Narcissists use various manipulative methods, such as gaslighting and attacking the weaknesses while undermining the strengths of the other person. However, if you already have a strong sense of self, you won't be easily shaken by the manipulation of such narcissists. That's why dealing with narcissistic people can be challenging. More social issues than we think are linked to unhealthy narcissism. This is why issues like self-harm among teenagers in families have become severe nowadays. Ultimately, the emotional issues of such children are at stake.

There are too many cases caused by parents with prominent narcissistic tendencies, and issues such as child abuse by certain children, very prominent parent-child conflicts in Korea, are highly related to narcissism. In relationships between men and women, issues such as dating violence, infidelity, and possessiveness, as well as workplace bullying, harmful work environments, and sexual harassment, are linked to unhealthy narcissism. There are numerous studies connecting various social issues such as bullying, extreme conflicts between groups based on race, gender, or political views, online abuse, and various crimes to unhealthy narcissism. Therefore, I really feel that there are far too many unhealthy narcissistic connections to various social issues in society.

Because we are connected, we focus on this part more and believe that by understanding it more and making changes, we can change many issues. Many people tend to think that narcissism only has positive meanings. For example, there are those who only know the positive side, such as loving themselves greatly and valuing themselves highly. On the other hand, there are also those who understand narcissism, which we are talking about now, in a negative sense. In fact, narcissism exists on a continuum from healthy narcissism to pathological narcissism. Dr. Craig Malkin described well in a book how a person with healthy narcissism can appear.

You have described narcissism in this way. Currently, having a healthy narcissism that values oneself and believes in one's own worth and abilities can allow a person to dream and enjoy fantasies about achieving great things without becoming too obsessed or fixated on them. In other words, people with healthy narcissism desire attention and praise but do not feel the need to constantly prove their abilities. They pursue the belief that they can achieve great things but do not get discouraged by the big or small failures that may occur along the way. They feel the desire to focus on themselves and strive for success but are willing to control their actions appropriately when the cost of success, such as harming others, becomes too high. Therefore, this content illustrates how people with healthy narcissism can behave.

외도, 갑질, 갈등의 중심인 나르시시스트...이런 사람은 휘둘리지 않습니다 (정신과 의사 원은수 3부)

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스터디언

자존감을 위한 안정된 정체성의 중요성

나르시시스트는 안정된 정체성을 가지면 자신을 조종하기 어렵고 자존감이 안정된 사람들과 교류하는 것을 불편해합니다.

안정된 정체성을 가진 사람은 경계가 명확하고 자신을 긍정적으로 평가하며 외부 상황에 영향을 덜 받아 자존감이 안정적입니다.

반면 나르시시스트는 정체성이 불분명하고 외부의 성공에 의존하기 때문에 자존감이 불안정하고 오만해질 수 있습니다.

정체성과 나르시시즘이 정서적 안녕에 미치는 영향

외부로부터 인정받지 못하면 자존감이 크게 낮아지고 정서적 고통으로 이어질 수 있습니다.

정체성이 분명한 사람들은 나르시시스트의 겉모습을 꿰뚫어봄으로써 나르시시스트가 자신을 조종하기 어렵게 만들어 불편하게 만들 수 있습니다.

나르시시즘적인 사람들을 다루는 것은 어려울 수 있으며, 이들의 행동은 청소년의 자해 증가 등 다양한 사회 문제와 관련이 있습니다.

불건전한 나르시시즘이 사회 문제에 미치는 영향

불건전한 자기애는 아동 학대, 데이트 폭력, 직장 내 괴롭힘, 온라인 폭력 등 다양한 사회 문제와 밀접한 관련이 있습니다.

이러한 문제는 개인의 두드러진 나르시시즘 성향에서 비롯되는 경우가 많으며 부모와 자녀 간의 심각한 갈등과 집단 간 갈등으로 이어질 수 있습니다.

이러한 사회적 문제를 해결하고 사회를 긍정적으로 변화시키기 위해서는 건강한 나르시시즘부터 병적인 나르시시즘까지 나르시시즘의 연속성을 이해하는 것이 중요합니다.

건강한 나르시시즘은 개인이 집착하지 않고 성공에 대한 꿈과 환상을 꾸고, 끊임없이 자신의 가치를 증명하지 않고도 자신을 소중히 여길 수 있게 해줍니다.

성취를 추구하지만 실패를 감당할 수 있고, 다른 사람에게 피해를 주지 않으면서 성공을 위해 노력합니다.