가정 폭력과 피해자 고립의 주기

### 가정 폭력의 주기: 피해자 격리 및 통제에 대한 이해
* 🚨 긴장된 가정 상황에서 피해자는 **갇혀 있고 무력감을 느끼며**, 가해자의 지속적인 위협에 직면하면서 지원을 받기 위해 자원에 의존하는 경우가 많습니다.
* 😔 가해자는 **반복되는 경찰 방문에 좌절감**을 표출하며 피해자가 벗어나기 위해 고군분투하는 폭력의 순환을 나타내며 **고립감과 절망감**을 강화합니다.
* 💰 피해자는 종종 돈에 대한 접근이 거부되어 관계를 떠나거나 자녀를 부양하기 어렵기 때문에 **재정적 통제는 중요한 요소**입니다.
* 📞 피해자는 가해자의 영향에 대한 두려움 때문에 도움을 요청할 수 없기 때문에 **가족 지원 부족**으로 인해 고립감이 더욱 심해집니다.
* 👶 가해자는 **아동을 지렛대로 삼아 상황을 조작**하고 아동을 데려가거나 해치겠다고 협박하여 피해자를 더욱 공포의 굴레에 빠뜨립니다.
* 😡 가해자가 피해자와 다른 사람의 상호작용에 폭력적으로 반응하는 것은 **감정적 조작**이 분명하며, 이는 관계의 **통제적 성격**을 보여줍니다.
* ⚠ 궁극적으로 피해자의 낮은 자존감과 가해자 없이는 살아남을 수 없다는 믿음은 피해자의 상황을 영속화하므로 지원 시스템이 **"탈출구가 있다"는 점**을 강화하는 것이 중요합니다.
* 💔 지속적인 위협과 정서적 학대는 위험한 환경을 조성하고, **피해자는 도움을 요청하기보다는 상황을 견디는 것만이 유일한 선택**이라고 느끼게 됩니다.

가정 폭력 피해자는 경제적 의존과 고립으로 인해 갇혀 있다고 느끼며 자신과 자녀의 안전에 대해 두려움을 느낍니다.

I'm getting so tired of coming back to this same house. I know it's so sad though because she never tells us what's really going on. I don't get it. I don't understand why she just doesn't leave. I still need to go to the store. Why haven't you already done that? I need to get some more money really. And just what did you do with the money I gave you last week? I bought food and I got your drink. I gave you more than enough money last week. Like if you don't know how to budget your money and you're just going to squander it on useless stuff. No, I didn't squander it. I looked for all the sales. I didn't spend anything on myself. I just I have to get some hamburger and milk. You're a stupid cow. I work like a dog to give you money and you just piss it away. Look, it's for the kids. I need to put food in their lunch boxes. The money that you gave me last week. It didn't last. I

gave you more than enough money to get the things we need. I'm not giving you another cent. And why not a beer? I'm gonna want one with dinner. Oh, I don't have any money. That's not my problem. It's yours. There are many reasons why a victim of domestic violence feels unable to leave a relationship. She may have no access to money. Her batterer may have interfered with her ability to get or maintain a job outside of the home. She's been told repeatedly that she cannot provide for herself or her children without him. She feels completely trapped. No, I know, Mom. I haven't called in a while, but it's just because we're busy with the kids, you know, soccer and gymnastics, Dad's birthday party. No, actually, I don't think we're gonna be able to make it this time. Um, I'm sorry. I know. How is Dad feeling? We tell him I'm sorry. By the time the police are called to the scene, the victim is already isolated. She doesn't have friends to go to, family.

members with one look. She knows it's not safe to even go to her dad's birthday party. Isolation is intentional. I'm getting two dips of chocolate. Where are you guys going? I'm gonna take them for ice cream. Oh, I'm about to start dinner. I don't think they should have ice cream right now. Hey guys, once you go get in the car. Yeah, ice cream. Yes, who do you think you are telling me what I can and can't do with my children? I just meant I don't think they should have ice cream right now. That's all. If you don't like the decisions I'm making about the kids, I can always take them from you and you won't have to worry about it anymore. No, you know what? No, it's fine. I'll just make dinner later. You know, it's fine. It's not a problem. Come on guys, get out of the car. Mommy's not going to let us have ice cream. Oh man, well I. Daddy's sorry. You suck. Hey, don't talk to mommy like that. It's actually appalling how a batter

will use the children to try to control a victim, either by manipulating them to support his behaviors, to groom them to become batterers, or to believe that battering is part of any family relationship. More commonly, a batterer will make threats to the victim to take the children away, injure them, or even kill them. So, what do we have here? We have a victim who has no financial support, no family support, or other support, has low self-esteem, and who truly believes that harm will come to her children if she tries to leave. I saw you talking to that guy in the parking lot. Telling you the truth, it was our son's soccer coach, that's all. I just said hi to him, that's it. I was watching from my car. It was more than just hi. We were talking about how well Terry is doing in sovereignty. Really? Because I saw you talking about more than just Terry. I can't take this anymore. Don't you walk away from me. Don't you understand that if you ever try to leave me, I will kill you.

I will hunt you down, and I will kill you. Damn it, the neighbors must have called the cops again. You better handle this, or I will really give you something to be upset about. In this situation, the victim feels like she has no way out. You're her resource to help her. I understand it's frustrating for you to have to go out to the same house all the time or deal with the same victim, but you need to reinforce the idea that she's doing nothing wrong, that you're there as a resource to help her. And every time you go out there, you make a positive change. And one day, this victim will understand that there is a way out of the situation, and you're there to help. Please don't give up on her. Hi, Mrs. Collins, are you okay? You

Domestic Violence

SD Media Pros

학대적인 관계를 떠날 때의 어려움

가정폭력 피해자는 돈과 일자리가 부족하고 자신이나 자녀를 부양할 수 없다는 가해자의 반복되는 메시지로 인해 갇힌 느낌을 받는 경우가 많습니다.

친구나 가족으로부터 고립되면 상황이 더욱 복잡해져 도움을 요청하기가 어렵습니다.

경찰이 신고했을 때 피해자는 이미 취약하고 고립된 상황에 처해 있습니다.

한 어머니가 아빠의 생일 파티에 참석하는 것이 안전하지 않다고 느끼고 의도적으로 자신을 고립시키려고 합니다.

그녀는 아이들과 아이스크림을 먹으러 갈 계획이지만, 그녀의 결정에 반대하는 사람과 갈등이 생깁니다.

상황이 악화되어 격렬한 대화가 오가고 어머니는 지원 부족에 좌절감을 느낍니다.

가해자에 의한 피해자 조작 및 통제

가해자는 종종 피해자를 통제하기 위해 아동을 이용하며, 학대 행위를 지지하도록 조종하거나 해치겠다고 협박합니다.

피해자는 일반적으로 재정적 및 가족적 지원이 부족하여 자존감이 낮고 떠나는 것이 자녀를 위험에 빠뜨릴 것이라는 믿음을 갖게 됩니다.

이러한 통제의 순환은 폭력의 위협으로 강화되어 피해자에게 절망적인 상황을 조성합니다.

피해자는 같은 집에 경찰이 반복적으로 출동하는 등 학대의 악순환에 갇혀 있다고 느낍니다.

자원 담당자는 좌절감을 느끼지만 피해자에게 잘못이 없다는 점을 강조하며 돕기로 결심합니다.

피해자가 예산을 책정하고 자녀를 부양하려는 노력에도 불구하고 학대자는 화를 내고 무시하여 긴장되고 어려운 상황이 조성됩니다.