부모님께 재정적 도움 요청하기 팁 및 고려 사항

### 성인 자녀를 위한 재정 지원의 미묘한 균형 탐색하기
* 💡 성인 자녀는 경제적으로 어려움을 겪고 있지만 부모는 재정적으로 탄탄한 위치에 있는 경우, **잠재적인 지원에 대한 대화**를 이끌어내는 것이 어려울 수 있습니다.
* 🔑 " 이 돈은 매우 금기시되는 주제이고 어렵습니다. 그리고 **한 번 입에서 나오면 다시는 되돌릴 수 없습니다.**"
* 🗣 부모님에게 어려움과 필요성을 명확하게 전달하여 **단순한 욕구가 아닌 정당한 관심사**라는 것을 이해하도록 하세요.
* 🤝 해결책을 제시하고 재정 상황을 개선하기 위해 적극적으로 노력하고 있음을 보여줌으로써 **서로 윈윈할 수 있는 시나리오**를 만들어 보세요.
* ❌ 단순한 금전적 교환이 아닌 관계에 기반한 지원이 이루어져야 하므로 **거래적인 성격의 지원은 피하세요.**
* 🤔 부모님의 결정을 존중하고 관계에 마찰을 일으키지 않도록 **'아니오'라는 대답이 나올 가능성**에 정신적으로 대비하세요.
* 🧠 "여러분도 부모님의 모든 상황을 알 수는 없습니다. 부모님이 **'안 된다'고 말씀하신다면 생각보다 더 많은 일이 벌어지고 있을 수 있다**는 사실을 기억하세요."
* 💼 재무 설계사는 이러한 어려운 대화를 탐색하고 **상황의 감정적 측면과 분석적 측면의 균형**을 맞추는 데 중요한 역할을 할 수 있습니다.

성인 자녀는 부모에게 재정적 도움을 요청할 때 자신의 어려움을 명확하게 전달하고 부모님의 결정을 존중하여 해결책을 제시해야 합니다.

[Music] All right, so let's talk about the other side of the equation. Let's talk about maybe, and I don't want to say more delicate because neither of these is more delicate than the other, but this is a hard one. What if you're the child? What if you are someone who is in the messy middle, or you are at a stage where life is hard, and you are struggling right now, and you do happen to know that your parents are in a financial situation where they are on sound financial footing, and you've come to this realization. Okay, I know that life will be okay one day 'cause Mom and Dad have done great, but man, you know, it's going to, when, if, if they live, they're going to live a ripe long life, and I'm going to hit all this money 30 years from now. Man, I don't know if it would really help me. It would be life-changing. It would be trajectory-altering if maybe I had some of that help now as opposed to later. How do you do that? Well, 'cause that one can

be real dicey. Be careful. Yep, this is the first thing. We'll get into some actual tips here, but I do want to tell you to be careful 'cause I think it's a part of the human condition. We're all somewhat selfish. Oh yeah, so you might be in a situation to where you think that, hey, this is a no-brainer for Mom and Dad to help me. I'll just bring up my concerns, my wishes, and you know, and they should help me. Just make sure that you, you just be careful 'cause this money is a very, it's a taboo subject, and it's hard. And you know, once it comes out of your mouth, you don't get to get it back. So that's why this is definitely a measure twice, cut once before you even go down this path. And I would challenge you to really make sure your heart, make sure your, your, your mindset, and what, and your perspective on this situation is actually going to be heard the way you think it's going to be.

heard because this this could be very challenging so let's talk about some what to do and what not to do. Here's the first what to do: clearly communicate that there is a struggle present. Explain to your parents, hey, here's what's going on, man. I really, I really, the school system we're in is not wonderful and there's a great school but we just can't quite get the tuition together, but we really want that to be the education there. Clearly communicate that there is a need and that that need is actually a need and not a want, and that there's a goal behind why you're trying to achieve that thing. If you can clearly paint the picture for them, it will seem less like it's this emotional, visceral thing where you're just trying to get into their back pocket, and I think if they actually see it's something that you need and not something that you want, the parents are going to clue into that, they're going to recognize that it is a legitimate concern. Well, and the second thing we put

was provide a solution. Now what we mean by that, this is not meaning your parents are the solution with their money check there's. It means that you is part of this cuz think about about any good presentation if you're going to have a hat and hand moment to where you're the adult child coming to your parents humbly asking for their help. You don't want to seem like you're asking just for what it potentially is a straight up hand out. You need to show them that this is a win-win scenario, meaning that you are part of the solution. And I'll give you I'll give you an example on this. In the book millionaire Mission, I shared that as soon as I got into my my adult life, I think a lot of people into this is that I all my adult decisions added up much more than I could have ever realized when you start paying your first apartment even with roommates you start paying your first apartment. You get your first car payment to get you to your your job that's actually going to

be your wealth-building engine. And then you got your lifestyle choices that you have to figure out. How often am I going out to eat with my friends? How often am I taking my girlfriend out to eat? How often, you know, all these things groceries and how we're splitting up adult life kicked my butt and I ran up some credit card debt and I'm not I'm not proud that this happened to the point that I just couldn't make the math work and I had to call my father and I said, Look, um, I can't. I'm $300 short. Which, you know, is it was very humbling but I shared with him that I would never make this mistake again. I was already trimming certain things, was going to start, you know, taking my lunch to work and all. I shared the solution. And then I'll tell you internally it tore me up inside to know what to do, disappointment I was to my parents to have this perceived success I graduated, got my first big job, and then here I was coming right back to them asking for money 'cause

I couldn't do it on my own. I made sure internally that I said, Look, you're never ever ever going to put yourself in this situation again. And I created a solution for myself. So there's nothing wrong. I did the right thing instead of paying the high in credit card debt. But you got to make sure that you're providing a solution so this doesn't look like you're just asking for a handout and you're going to just keep repeating this cycle over and over in an unhealthy way. The other thing you have to do is mentally prepare yourself when you go and ask someone a yes or no question. You need to be prepared that if the answer is not what you were anticipating, you need to make sure, Are my parents actually willing to do this? You can lay out your struggle and you can lay out the solution. You can lay all this out. But at the end of the day, it's their money and they get to choose if they help or not. And if their answer is no, you need to be okay with that.

need to recognize that it's their choice to make. You cannot storm in there and begin demanding, Mom and Dad, I need this help, you got to do this, you got to do this. That's going to create friction in the relationship that you do not want, and they may say, Hey, we'd love to help, but we can't. You have to respect that, and you have to be comfortable with their no being a no, or else it's going to lead to a very negative and bad, and let me save some relationships here. You don't know their full picture either. I think about, and this is a childhood story, but I remember I wanted a go-kart so bad when I was a kid, and I knew my dad made $40,000 a year, and I had done the math, and I was like, Why is my dad not buying me a go-kart? He can afford 20 or 30 go-karts, you know. But what I was doing, what I call go-kart math, rightly named, because what I wasn't

realizing was hey as an adult you have more ages. You got kids education. You've got, you know, all the after-school things. You've got all the groceries. You've got all the expenses that nobody tells you as a kid that you have. You know, if your parents tell you, No, I want you, because for the sake of the relationship, just know there must be more going on than you realize. 'Cause maybe if you have siblings, there's already stuff going on there. Or maybe they have, they're not in as good a financial situation if you might have been led to believe. You've seen that bow in your own life where, you know, you thought some things were going to be funded certain way, and then you find out, Hey, parents just didn't have the money. That's right. So, so don't make false assumptions, um, and be careful because you don't want to ruin the more powerful overall relationship. So that's what to do. Let's talk about what not to do. These are Big make sure you don't create this as a transactional thing. Hey, Mom and Dad.

I need this, so you should give me this. And it's a transaction. This, if they choose to help you. And if this is something that's a part of your financial plan, it needs to be driven by the relationship and not the transaction. If you let the transaction drive, and it just feels transactional, nobody wins in that scenario. It's not good for you. It's not good for your parents. It's not what the original tweet of this show was getting at. That is a very, very different thing. So be careful not to let it turn into purely transactional. Yeah. And I hope for my audience that maybe is on the side of this where you are the adult, you've done well, you've saved well, you've planned well, and you know you're ahead of the curve. I hope you will kind of look at your life and say, Hey, how can I use this as a blessing now? Because what is great, and I love this, was from the original tweet, is that if you can make memories with your children now, if you can help

them out with maybe some of those educational goals, or some of those other struggles that they're having at this moment, versus just waiting for 20-25 years in the future where they're old, you're old, and those assets never got to actually connect and let you actually see the fruit of all your hard work, all your discipline, and all your labor. Let's figure out how we do this in a healthy way, and that's what a good financial planner can do. I love that it was a financial planner that shared this tweet. I love that we're fee-only financial planners, that we get to share this content with you guys, because this is the hard stuff that I do think makes financial planners help. We, in a lot of ways, are the moderators between some of these hard life decisions on how do you navigate the emotional stuff, the relationship stuff, but also get the math and all the analytics stuff that a lot of people just take for granted. How do you get the perfect balance on that? A lot of times, it means taking the

What to Do vs. What Not to Do If You Have Boomer Parents

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재정적으로 안전한 부모님께 도움을 요청하는 방법

재정 지원 요청의 민감한 특성을 고려하여 이 주제에 신중하게 접근하는 것이 중요합니다.

자신의 어려움과 진정한 도움의 필요성을 명확하게 전달하고, 단순한 희망이 아닌 필요라는 점을 강조하세요.

지원이 필요한 이유와 지원이 자신의 미래에 어떤 영향을 미칠지에 대한 명확한 그림을 그려서 이기적인 요청처럼 보이지 않도록 하세요.

부모님의 도움을 구하는 것을 포함하여 재정적 결정에 대한 주인의식을 갖는 것이 중요합니다.

능동적인 접근 방식과 변화의 의지를 보여주면 재정적 위기를 학습의 기회로 바꿀 수 있습니다.

도움을 요청하는 것이 주는 정서적 영향은 같은 실수를 반복하지 않겠다는 다짐을 이끌어내야 합니다.

재정적 어려움 극복하기 및 도움 요청하기

유인물에 의존하거나 건강하지 않은 악순환을 반복하기보다는 재정적 어려움에 대한 해결책을 마련하는 것이 중요합니다.

재정적 도움을 요청할 때는 '거절'의 가능성에 대비하고 상대방의 결정을 존중하세요.

상대방도 각자의 재정적 상황과 한계를 가지고 있다는 사실을 인정하고 이해와 존중의 마음으로 상황에 접근하는 것이 중요합니다.

부모와 성인 자녀 간의 재정적 기대치 관리하기

성인이 되면 자녀 교육, 방과 후 활동, 식료품 구입 등 어린 시절에 배우지 못한 예상치 못한 재정적 책임이 생기게 됩니다.

가족 재정에 대해 잘못된 가정을 하지 말고 부모와 순전히 거래적인 관계를 맺지 않는 것이 중요합니다.

대신, 재정적 지원은 단순히 주고받는 관계가 아니라 전반적인 관계에 따라 이루어져야 합니다.

원래 트윗에서 강조한 것처럼, 어른들은 재정적 안정을 축복으로 삼아 자녀와 의미 있는 추억을 만드는 것이 중요합니다.

인생의 어려운 결정을 내리는 데 있어 재무 설계사의 역할

훌륭한 재무 설계사는 개인이 현재 자산을 미래 목표에 연결할 수 있도록 도와줍니다.

재무 설계사, 특히 수수료만 받는 재무 설계사는 재무 의사 결정의 정서적, 관계적 측면을 조정하는 중재자 역할을 합니다.

재무의 정서적 측면과 분석적 측면의 균형을 맞추려면 고객과의 관계를 더 깊은 수준으로 끌어올려야 하는 경우가 많습니다.