College is such a mixed bag. It feels like for every one person that really finds themselves there, there's three more

that lose themselves, and then like 20 that just drop out after a year or two and lose thousands of dollars. Growing up, I

remember people telling me in college, attendance doesn't matter; you can even skip class if you want to. And then I get

here, and almost every class has some kind of attendance credit that completely screws you over if you don't

go. I remember one time in freshman year, I had this utterly useless orientation class for engineering where miscellaneous professors came in

and gave presentations on like how to build a Lego robot arm that picks your nose and wipes your ass. And the only

reason I went is that it was like 20% of my grade, and they made you use these

little clicker devices to sign in for attendance. But I forgot mine that day, and so I had to use the phone app

instead to sign in, which makes you log into your university account like three times before you can use it. And I kept

getting my password wrong, and the teacher closed the attendance sign-in. So I asked if I could get attendance, and he

just made a vague joke at my expense and refused to answer my question at all and made me look like an idiot in front of

the class. And then the guy next to me was like, "Yo, dude, he once did that to me, and he never gave me attendance. I

would just leave if I were you." And so I did. I just walked out in the middle of the lecture and slammed the door, and

then I just went out into the university lawn and threw my backpack down and just lay on the grass staring up at the clouds. I

like to think that professor was tweaking, crying at himself in the mirror after that, but I'll never know. I

never went back to that class again. Then there's the fundamental problem with classes themselves: enrolling in a

college class is like entering an alternate reality tunnel where you're subjected to the whims of an all-

powerful god that has control over the quality of your immediate future. I took Japanese for a year, which was a hard

subject. Okay, I was barely scraping by. I had a seat and I was proud of it, and the teacher was this ancient lady who made a

rule that if you miss three classes, your grade is dropped by a letter. Fair enough, right? I missed two classes, two, and then

on the last day of class, she comes up to me and is like, "Sorry, young man, you were late five times, and five times counts as

another absence, so your grade is now a D." You stupid [ __ ]! It took me a good 10

minutes to process what she was telling me, which is that this lady is essentially failing me from her class on

the last day with no warning. I swear on my life that I was barely ever late and never by more than 5 minutes. You would

think that she'd mentioned this oddly specific grading mechanic once in class, but nope. So that was awesome. The worst

part is how different the same class can be between professors. I remember that same semester my friends and I,

consisting of two engineering majors and one architecture major, were all required to take a music appreciation class, which

first of all, what the [ __ ]? But second of all, we somehow ended up getting assigned

to different professors that taught the same course. Now, my friend's professor did not give a [ __ ] about the class; it

was entirely online, open-note, so they just Googled every assignment. My professor, on the other hand, was this

sick, twisted bastard whose class was completely in person, and every few weeks we had a 50-question, no-notes-allowed

exam in which we had to memorize like 15 different classical music pieces and answer questions like, 'How many moles

were on Beethoven's left testicle?' I literally almost failed that class; it obliterated my GPA, along with Japanese

and yet my friends passed without studying or attending class once. And, according to the school, these are the

exact same classes. Are you seeing the problem here? And then you realize that all this [__] is just a relic of the

pre-internet world. School has gone from being a necessary archive of critical information to an arbitrary list of

subjects whose victims are forced to attend and are punished when they don't learn the right things, in the right way,

at the right time. Here's some random information on a topic you don't give a rat's ass about; learn it by next week, or

you're objectively a bad person, according to our grading system that condenses a person's collective knowledge into a single number. This is

quite possibly the most effective way to make someone hate learning possible. I do realize I'm ranting a lot

here, and I want to end this video on a positive note, so I'll say this: for what it's worth, despite everything,

college has been absolutely worth it for me. It's given me the space to try stuff out and experience things I never would

have elsewhere, and I've met some of my closest friends—just amazing people that have made me who I am today. So this is

not supposed to be a video on why you shouldn't go to college. I can't make any

objective claims about whether it's worth it to go to college because it's so contextual, and people's experiences

are so vastly different, I do think that for the right reasons it can be a valuable stepping stone to achieving your dreams.

For example, if you're trying to become a Beethoven *testicular* scholar, it's absolutely worth it.

Things I hate about college

Things I hate about college

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