the biggest mistake guys make when trying to become more attractive to women is that they often do it through the perspective of the male gaze instead of the female gaze.

Now, this got me thinking: how can women be so into tall, jacked, masculine guys, but at the same time, loads of women are attracted to members of BTS?

And how are sometimes attractive women together with men who look just about average? So here's what I realized: what women are attracted to has a huge variance, and the biggest mistake we make as guys is to try to cut it down to science when it's anything but that.

In this video, we're going to teach you the difference between what guys think women want versus what women actually find attractive. Part one: the female gaze at its core is story-driven.

There's a reason why the best-selling books every year are romance novels, and their biggest consumers are women. It's the same reason why artists and musicians throughout history have been loved by women.

They use their creativity to tell a story. You also tell a story every time you walk out of a door as a guy; you just don't realize it.

The way you dress, your choice of hair, what do you think is the best hairstyle a guy can have?

Fluffy middle part, high fade. You have a mullet? It's good. Like, long and out of the face.

The longer hair, just like wavy. The way you walk, the way you hold eye contact, you love designs. So you're basically a match made in heaven, right?

Guys' interests, yeah. And your body language, these all tell a story, and women pick up on them. Part two: looks do matter.

Women obviously are attracted to or prefer a handsome guy, a nice jawline, slight facial hair, height, a lean physique, darker features, and a mix of masculine and feminine features.

If you wanted to create a guy that is attractive to the most amount of women worldwide, he'd probably look something like Cristiano Ronaldo or Michele from the film 365 Days.

But even when it comes down to looks, there's a huge variance in types. Women have preferences when it comes to a guy's ethnicity.

They have preferences when it comes to a man's body type. Make a guy a bit more feminine and you have Zayn Malik.

Make him more masculine and you have Chris Hemsworth. But remember, these are just ideals.

As a guy yourself, you might like tall blondes, but that doesn't mean that you'll say no to short brunettes. So just like women have a type, that doesn't mean that they are automatically rejecting everything else.

Part three: The Black Pill Antidote. For some reason, when guys discover women's desire to have a man who's tall, rich, and fit, it makes them feel insecure about themselves and hopeless.

If you spend an hour in any busy downtown square and observe couples through your male gaze, here's what you'll notice: average guys with average girls, and average guys with beautiful girls.

This is because through the female gaze, women don't view male attractiveness as a purely physical equation. As men, we put so much effort into improving our physical attractiveness, and it's the only thing we compare when we see a couple.

Now, don't get me wrong, women crave a guy with a V-taper just like us men are attracted to women with an hourglass body.

At the end of the day, the first thing a woman sees when she first meets you isn't your face, right?

It's your humor, voice, smell, charisma, skills, your love language, and so many other aspects. Still, determine how attractive you are through the female gaze.

Women are attracted to so much more than just looks. Part four: The female gaze is dynamic. Let me explain.

If a girl is not attracted to a guy at first sight, the physical attraction can still grow a ton once she knows more about you.

The majority of men fall into the, "Yeah, he's all right" category. As the girl gets to know him, he can either fumble it into, "I would never," or elevate into, "He's so hot." This is a bit hard to understand as a guy because when we see a beautiful girl at first, we fall in love instantly.

Part five: Relative versus absolute. Let's talk about the three things that absolutely belong to the female gaze: height, income, and status.

We've all heard the phrase, "six figures, six feet, and a six-pack." All of these things are attractive, but most guys still get it wrong.

When girls say they want a taller guy, this is a relative statement. It means that they want a man who's taller than them, and the same goes for income and status.

Statistically, most couples have this one thing in common: the man is only a few inches taller than the woman, and the man makes only a bit more money.

Status is a bit harder to calculate, but we can assume that this is probably true as well.

And let's be honest, most guys lie about their height, which has given rise to false expectations of what six feet actually looks like.

So as long as you're a few inches taller and make slightly more money than the woman you want to attract, you're going to be all right.

Part six: Wide appeal versus niche maxing. A lot of men's content on improving attractiveness can sometimes spread the feeling that you need to appeal to as many people as possible.

Some traits are universal, such as having good skin and an aesthetic body. But trying to appeal to as many girls as possible is pretty much impossible.

Instead, find your niche and thrive in that area. If you're a gym guy and you're into bodybuilding, you're most likely going to attract fitness girls who share the same passions as you.

Looking at human psychology, most people end up together with people who are in their relative class and ethnic group.

The same thing works here. Girls will find a guy who has similar hobbies or interests far more attractive than a guy who doesn't.

Part seven: Women don't like nice guys. Girls don't like nice guys because it shows their weakness and desperate feelings to win her attention.

Naturally, women want something they can't have over something they can easily get. So not giving a girl too much attention is not necessarily a bad thing.

That's why women like bad boys, not because they are criminals or dangerous, but because they represent certain traits that are attractive. They're typically confident, social, and stand up for themselves and the people around them.

Girls like a guy who sets boundaries and doesn't let people run over him.

Being a submissive pushover and a people pleaser is perhaps the most unattractive trait a man can have, and a bad boy represents the exact opposite of this.

The traits behind being a bad boy make a girl attracted to them, and the same goes for being rich.

It's not the actual money factor that makes a rich guy attractive, but rather the qualities behind acquiring wealth: hard work, determination, leadership, and courage.

A lot of men are defining their self-worth with the validation of being able to get attention from a beautiful girl. They are trying to compete with impossible standards or standards that they can never reach.

And as these men are learning how to become more attractive to women, they come across videos that teach them to change their personalities and who they are just to appeal to a girl.

By making this video, I hope that you have gained a fuller picture of what women are actually looking for through the female gaze.

what women actually find attractive

Scripts