It's sort of like you're training yourself to adopt a little bit of this attitude of stoicism, but you're not you're not really bearing the pain of it. I'm not really asking you to endure some terrible pain; I'm asking you to

actually let it go. That's a distinction that's distinct. To let something go means that it stops painting you. Like, see, there's a difference between if I insult you, and then you just you take the insult personally and then it's paining you, but then you're just kind of

like holding it in and you're not saying anything. You're just kind of closing your mouth right, but inside of you it's like, "I need to get back at him. He insulted me." Like, it's like you haven't let it go at that point, even

though you're repressing it. To let it go is like, "Oh, why is this thing even affecting me at all?" And just imagine letting it go, and then that becomes the case. Now, of course, sometimes you'll imagine letting it go, but then your mind will get stuck on it

and it'll come right back at you again. So you might let it go for five seconds, but then it hits you again because, you know, the mind gets in these cycles and vortices. And that's exactly what this obsessive-compulsive disorder is, sort of like this

cycle that you can't break out of because you're so habituated to it. And literally, it's almost like a computer program that they get stuck on a loop, and it feels like your mind is doing that as well. Well, that's exactly right. Your mind gets

stuck on these things and especially if you spent years feeding these cycles, these cycles can get very strong and they can get difficult to break. So just practice, practice, practice, practice. Now the other objection people have here is this: 'But Leo, if I let it go then I

won't get what I want.' Let that go. Let go of the need to get what you want. Be chill. Trust that the universe will bring you what you need in the long run and that you know you don't need to be neurotic to get it.

This requires developing some confidence in the power of letting go. Trust that letting go will actually make you a more powerful person and it will... this is a powerful principle I'm teaching you, a powerful spiritual technique here, really. This is a technique of detachment. Detachment is

counterintuitive. Letting go is very counterintuitive because the ego thinks that by clinging and attaching to things that it will get more. See, the ego is always needy. It needs money, it needs sex, it needs food, it needs ice cream, it needs titillation, it needs excitement, it

needs to feel warm or it needs to feel cold because it's too hot or whatever. And so it always needs, needs, needs and it feels like it needs to grab and cling on everything to kind of get its way, to survive. And here we're

we're going directly against that. This is a counterintuitive move. We're trying to teach your ego to realize that, 'Oh, I don't need to live life like that to be satisfied. In fact, I'll never be satisfied if I live life like that.' That's a neurotic

way to live, this teaches you confidence, that teaches you poise, this teaches you a little bit of detachment and stoicism. The other question people have here is, Leo, if I let go, how will I get stuff done? And this is where it's counterintuitive.

What I'm suggesting is that actually you'll be better at getting stuff done by letting stuff go. Like you might wonder, if you're an artist, you get a bit obsessive and perfectionistic about your art, you want it to be perfect. And see if I tell

you to just let it go, you might say, well Leo, but but I need to be perfectionistic because if I'm not perfectionistic in my work, then my work, my art, is not going to be as beautiful and as perfect as as it is. And what I'm telling you is that

no, actually it's the opposite. It's your perfectionism and your artistic neuroticism which is getting in the way of you making better art. The best art is made in a in a relaxed state, when you're in a relaxed state, creative ideas come to you, you get

inspired and you're in a flow state, whereas when you're neurotic and you're you're trying to force it to be perfect, that's precisely the thing that will make it imperfect. The other objection people have here is this one, but Leo, won't this make me a

cold-hearted monster, letting stuff go. It's like you're trying to train me to be this android that doesn't care about anything, that isn't affected by anything, and I won't be emotional, I won't be able to feel. You're trying to like make me dead.

inside uh especially women can have this objection because of course women value emotions more women are run by emotions more and to women it feels like when we talk about detaching from emotions that feels like we're becoming hyper-rational or logical or disconnected from feeling no that's not what I'm saying it's the

opposite what I'm saying is that you feel into it you're going to be more capable of feeling this is actually going to help you to open your heart and to be able to be more loving and compassionate because you're going to be less clingy

and less needy so you can still feel emotions you can still be run by emotions at times but also I want you to get good at just letting it go let go of emotions this will make your emotions this will actually elevate the quality of your emotions your emotions will become more

spiritual more sort of metaphysical and more detached in a good way not in a bad way uh if you practice this technique you won't be as run by your emotions but you're still going to be able to feel and even feel more deeply because you're

practicing being aware of how you're feeling that's actually helping you also I just want to warn you that remember that I'm not saying you have to let go of these things forever just on this one particular occasion I'm not saying you have to go around for

the rest of your life feeling hungry just because you have hunger hunger pains you know most the time when you feel hungry feed yourself but sometimes let go of the hunger I'm also not telling you to never enjoy pleasure and I'm not saying that you need to feel

bad for indulgences when you indulge in some [Music] some sinful pleasure and I'm not saying that you need to stop fixing problems like if there's a problem in your life, fix that problem. I'm not saying to ignore and deny and

repress issues like for example if if some co-worker is is committing fraud at work and you notice that I could tell you to let it go and you could let that go, but I'm also I don't mean that you just like let that person

keep committing fraud or that like if your boyfriend is cheating on you then you just like let that go and then you just like don't tell him anything you don't confront him and you just let him keep cheating I don't mean that I mean that let go of that

hurt that you feel from being cheated on let that go of course that's gonna be very difficult to let go and practice but try to let it go at least for a minute let it go even if you do pick it right back up a minute later

um mean then you can still have a conversation you can confront the person about it you see so letting go of these emotions and feelings and compulsions doesn't necessarily mean that you then don't do anything about the issue in fact this is a common problem people

have is that people are such animals they are so run by their knee-jerk emotions without any separation between that and getting stuff done that over time over the decades they they train themselves to believe that in life the only way you can survive and get stuff done is when

You're run like an animal by your emotions, so it's like, Leo, but how am I gonna close the sale if I'm unable to manipulate the client? Well, there's ways to do sales without manipulating clients, and you might say, well, but Leo, how am I going to deal with

my co-workers? Usually I'm angry at them, and the only way I get work out of them is because I'm angry and I'm pissed off and I yell at them, and that's how I get my work done because, you know, they're making mistakes all the time, and

if I'm not pissed off at their mistakes, then the work's going to be bad. Well, the problem is is that you need to find a more resourceful way, a more conscious way to deal with your employees. There you see, anger, sure it might work

but it's only gotten you this far. Now, how do you get to the next level? Not through anger. Anger is not a very effective way to get stuff done. So, you can still be very effective. In fact, you will be more effective by being detached. That's the whole point.

But people are skeptical of this, but I'm not asking you to trust me. I'm asking you to try and to experiment, run a scientific experiment in your life through this process and prove to yourself through direct empirical evidence that being detached is a better way to live and a

more resourceful way to live, and you will be happier in the long run, and you will actually get more stuff done.

The Benefits Of Letting Go - How Your Life Can Be Easier

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