We tend to imagine that in order to live a good life, we need to have an appetite for the truth. But what if, in reality, in order to keep going and get anything done, we actually need to blind ourselves to a range of realities and swallow a

number of illusions without which we couldn’t possibly have the willpower to continue. Here are some of the blind spots necessary to our flourishing. First and foremost, we need to pretend that we’re not going to die and therefore have to convince ourselves that all the things we

fervently believe are so important and so urgent, really do matter and won’t look like incomprehensible, futile mulch within a hundred years or less. We have to care manically about what others think – though they hardly give us a thought, let alone a fair one.

We have to imagine that we could (one day) be loved and understood – though few things are, in fact, ever more in doubt. We have to stay on our side – though we know, in our hearts, how beastly and strange we really are.

We have to melt at the cuteness of small children – though we know how most of them will turn out and that the world we’re teaching them about doesn’t really exist. We have to look forward to the next few years

with excitement – though almost every new day is a scratchy six or below. We have to believe that we’re collectively making progress – though every invention unleashes a necessary set of appalling unintended consequences. We have to care about humanity – though most of its members are insufferable up close.

We have to look forward to the future – though if we had a chance to learn what fate had in store, we almost certainly wouldn't want to know. We have to keep being excited about buying things – though we

know how seldom any of them make a difference. We have to keep going travelling – though being somewhere else is always better in memory or anticipation. We have to keep seeing our so-called friends – though we would be crushed by hearing a fraction of what really goes through their minds.

We have to believe in a comfortable, wise old age – though it will mostly be agony, aches, and catheters. We have to not properly notice how beautiful, interesting, and opportunity-filled life is – in case we were to go mad from excitement and regret.

In short, let's not fool ourselves that we really want to know the full truth. We require only so much of it as is compatible with making it out of bed. We have to confront an uncomfortable fact about self-awareness: those who most know how to

enjoy life may also be those who – at points – are masters at fruitfully lying to themselves.

Things You Have to Forget in Order to Live

Self-understanding, calm and emotional maturity.

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Things You Have to Forget in Order to Live

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