close your eyes and take a deep breath. Focus on the energy in your head, all your thoughts, feelings, memories, and emotions. Find that little bit of happiness that may be lurking somewhere in there. Now grab that happiness and drop it down your back, and as it rolls, it will hit each notch of your spine, striking a note like a piano. Your happiness will ride down the crack of your buttocks into the dark netherworld that perhaps you aren't maintaining properly. Now breathe out and open your eyes, 'cause I'm here to tell you about the Smart Whale Clean Set to an electronic Bidet toilet seat that I think is going to make a big splash in the bathroom hygiene industry. I want to say thank you to the folks at Smart Whale for sending over this bidet for review. I'm not being paid for this. I'm going to be honest. I'm not going to sugarcoat things. I don't know if I have to send it back to them. I'm actively using it, so I don't

know if they want it back, but I could wipe it down first, I guess. So, the first thing to note about this bidet is, uh, the installation is a breeze. It takes minutes, literally no problems. It has a very nice toilet seat. It's heated. It's a nice consistent warmth. The lid has such a smooth slow close. Look at how just graceful that is. And there is our wand. It looks to be made of stainless steel with a plastic insert. The stainless steel is, of course, a nonporous surface, so all the viruses and bacteria can't permeate. It's a very smart machine, um, it's a quality machine. It comes with this remote. You can attach it to, you know, above your toilet paper roll. It has adhesive. You can just attach it to the side here, and then you can take it out of its holder. Over here, we have your different features such as nozzle cleaning, eco mode, child wash, NightLight, water temperature, air temperature, seat temperature, and recommended mode on. On the right, we have your different washes, air dryer, and in the middle, your

different washing positions and your washing pressure. There's three different settings for each spec here: your water temperature, air temperature, and seat temperature, three settings, your washing position, and your washing pressure, three settings, you know, soft, medium, hard. There's also a little knob on the side where you could just do quick, easy. You don't even need to touch the remote. If you lose your remote, you'll be fine. You can still operate this. It has a nightlight. It's high-tech. It reminds me a little bit of like an Apple product. This light is really cool. Like in the middle of the night, if I wanted to bidet my back, it turns red, and then I'll stop. Now, if I want it to bidet the front, I move it frontwards, and the light turns blue. People use the bidet for three reasons. Number one, obviously, is the cleanliness. You cannot compare toilet paper to a spray of water. It's way more clean to spray with water. Number two is the luxury aspect. There's all these functions of the bidet.

ensuring that you're having a pleasant experience. There's seat heating, there's warm water, there is air that will dry you. It's all very much pampering you as you go about your business. Number three is the therapeutic reason that people use Bidet, and it sort of enlivens your parts and will make you feel like you have to move your bowels. Now, I am happy to report that this Bidet has a function called power wash, and in the manual, it is said that the power wash is a special wash for constipation, meaning if I'm understanding it right, it's washing to get you to go. And I'm going to tell, I'm just going to front, I'm not going to beat around the bush here, I'm going to tell you right now, it is a high-quality spray. It feels, compared to some of my other Bidet experiences, it feels a little sharper, like the spray of the water has a little bit more of an edge to it, whereas some other Bidets have a bit more

of a brute force power pounding. This has more of a sharp wipe, not in an unpleasurable way at all, sort of just like a butter knife just scraping across the surface, wiping away all the debris. Now I'm going to hit you with some bad news. I have a complaint. It beeps. It beeps when I fiddle with the remote. If I change the air temperature, it beeps. I stop it, it beeps. Everything you do on this remote, it all beeps. I think that's kind of an invasion of privacy because right out here is my, yes, right out here is my wife's office. So she could hear every time I sit on the toilet, every time I stand up from the toilet, every time I try to find the right water pressure. Maybe that'll be a firmware update, we'll get rid of the beeping. Until then, I think that's a flaw. Now it's the time you've all been waiting for. It's the nut butter challenge where we take a little dab of peanut butter.

smear it on the lens of the GoPro, and then see how the spray does getting it off. I'm going to move that seat up, and as you can see, it did a heck of a job. Who is this product for? I think anybody in the market for an electronic smart bidet is going to want to take a look at this product. It's a new company, but I think that they did a lot of research into what the consumers want, and I think probably the people that made it are enthusiastic about the bidet experience. It has all the features that you want. There's not a single feature missing here. I think this is a great bidet. I'm very happy that they sent it to me, and I'm going to keep it on here for a while and use it. I'm just going to use it. I'm going to continue using it. A smart well one said to me, Doesn't matter if you poop or pee, sit down and enjoy the stream.

Bidet Review: SmartWhale Cleanslet-2

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