Approaching Women: Building Social Wealth and Confidence

Approaching people, especially women, can significantly impact one's life and social wealth, requiring courage, authenticity, and community involvement.

### The Ultimate Guide to Approaching Women and Building Social Wealth
* 😱 A recent study reveals that **45% of men aged 18 to 25 have never approached a woman**, despite the significant impact of social connections on one's life.
* 🏆 As a young man, creating **resource, spiritual capital, physical capital, and social capital** should be a top priority, with **social capital being the fastest to scale**.
* 🚀 Approaching strangers, especially women, can be life-changing and lead to **meeting lovers, friends, mentors, and business relationships**.
* 💪 The key to successful approaches is **courage, authenticity, and creating an inviting energy**.
* 🏞 Step one involves putting yourself in the right places and starting conversations with people to build a **sense of community and courage**.
* 🎯 Step two, the "secret sauce" to approaching anyone, is to **create an open and inviting energy** around you.
* 💬 Step three involves directly hitting on women by giving a **genuine compliment**, asking for their **name**, and proposing a **future interaction** without engaging in small talk.

a recent study shows that 45% of men ages 18 to 25 have never approached a woman in their lives. This is mind-blowing to me because approaching people and approaching women in general is the fastest way to change your life forever. Who you marry, who you hang out with, and the network you build in your 20s and 30s is going to impact your life more than anything else on the entire planet, and yet most people just leave this up in the air. They hang out with the friends and the options they've been given, and then they swipe through Tinder for new matches. They don't actively pursue, you know, an abundant social wealth. As a young man, your chief priority should be creating resource, creating spiritual capital, physical capital, and social capital. Of the three, social capital is the thing you can scale the fastest when you were young, and unless you're in college, most of you probably only meet a few interesting people a year. What if I told you you could meet a few interesting people a week? How much would that change your

life there's very few practices in my own life that I would deem absolutely lifechanging. Yeah there's like the coal plunge, there's meditation, there's really important things, but speaking on YouTube, writing a book, approaching strangers, and dancing are at the top of the list of things that radically changed who I am. A couple years ago I was living out of my van, and I was so fed up with being lonely and not meeting anyone, not meeting any women, not having any friends, and I was like screw this, I'm going to a city. So I went to Austin, Texas, went downtown, and I started approaching people. Really for the first time in my life, I approached people all day. I ended up meeting a cool climbing buddy who introduced me to his friend group, and all of a sudden I had friends for the rest of my time there, and it was a really awesome beginning to building social momentum and social wealth. I've now approached multiple strangers a week for years. I've met lovers, friends, best friends, mentors, business relationships, and acquaintances, and my

confidence just keeps growing as I find new ways of approach and new strategies for doing this. Sometimes it's awesome and exciting, and it flows easily, and other times it's terrifying and cringy, but that's the point. I value courage and connection, and you probably do too. I want to do everything in my power to bring the best sort of people into my life, but also to create a more courageous and connected world, even if it means having a few failures a year. And yes, those are embarrassing, but honestly, they're few and far in between. And this guide will help you avoid those. Now, approaching doesn't have to be difficult. In fact, with a little practice, it can actually be easy. Now, I know what you're thinking. Oh, you need looks, or you need status, you need money, you need charisma in order to be successful. That simply isn't true. What you really need is trials, a little bit of courage, and authenticity. One hello, my friends, one hello can change your life forever. So here's what I've learned after

approaching hundreds of people this year alone on how to make it feel natural and get the best results. Make sure to stick around till the end to get the best technique I have for approaching women directly. Also, a lot of this comes from my book The Psychology of Slaying Dragons, which just came out. Go check out the courage section in there. Let's get into the video. Okay, step one before we get into the secret sauce, we get into the techniques, we get into the vibe, you need to be involved in the community in the world. And here are five ways to do that. And at each of these destinations, locations, events, what you want to do is just start approaching anyone you find interesting and start building the practice, start building the courage. And that's all approach is. It's a practice of courage. It's not about the outcome, it's about saying hello and just seeing if you can start a conversation. If not, moving on, right? The five best places to do this is number one, coffee shops. Go find the best cafe in town and post up.

there be seen there like do your work there do your reading there I love to do that on a daily basis after the cafe. I go to the gym go find a gym where people your age are working out are doing fun things it's so easy to meet people at the gym. Number three is athletic events okay this is like kickboxing pickleball volleyball pickup volleyball is great if you live in a summary place there's so many events and sports and leagues and pickup games going on around you and even if you're not athletic like have the courage to start going and participating in something with other people it's a great way to meet people. Number four this is the best way and most successful way I've ever met women is dancing dance classes and ecstatic dance it's such a great way because you instantly have a new way of communicating with people Beyond words dancing. Number four is cavab bars bars and events my favorite thing is the music scene like finding a music venue and musicians bands types of music.

like to follow the more you can. Go to those things, the more you're going to see the same people who like to go to those things, and you feel a sense of community. And all of this is trying to put yourself in the correct position, right? That where you can meet people and also build warm leads like people who have seen you before, who you've interacted before so you can start building momentum and social wealth. In conclusion of Step One, put yourself in the right places and say hello to people. Approaching men tends to be a lot easier for me if they seem cool, if they seem interesting, just say hello. You might meet a really good friend of yours. And honestly, building Brotherhood, building a sense of male Community is a lot easier and a lot more lasting in my life so far. Step two, this is the secret sauce to approaching anyone, to approaching women specifically. Recently, I approached a cute girl at the coffee shop. I saw her reading a book I've read, and we just started talking. I just asked if I could

sit down. We ended up hanging out having a great time. It's pretty easy. Sometimes it's hard, sometimes it's easy. We went out to dinner. At dinner, we ended up talking a lot about social dynamics, and it was awesome because I got to pick her brain about being approached and how she's been approached in her life and what feels good, what feels bad about it. And we came down to there's a difference between getting hit on and being approached, and we're going to get into that later on in the video. And everything comes down to the energy, the energy of the person. With the right energy, approaching doesn't even feel like approaching. It's way effortless. And in the wise words of Sun Tzu from The Art of War, you should learn how to win without fighting. Here are the tactics that work best for me, and I'm just going to give you them in story form. The other day, I was going through line at the grocery store, and a cute woman rolled in behind me. Now, instead of making her feel trapped and unsafe and this weird guy is just like

talking me up. What I did instead is I started talking to everyone around me. I started asking the guy in front of me, like, Yo, where are you from? Where are you traveling to? I see you got a bunch of bags, you're going on a trip? Me and the cashier know each other, so we start cracking jokes, you know, to one another, and I bring her in on the conversation. The woman behind me, and now doing this makes people feel a lot more safe and inclusive. Like they're out and about, like they don't really want to just be cornered, but they want to be invited into something. And this energy is key, right? So the other day, a couple weeks ago, I went to a concert by myself. Now, I haven't done this ever in my life, going to a concert by myself, but it was an awesome social experiment where I got to observe how males interact. I saw a lot of guys show up by themselves. There's probably a couple hundred people in this venue, right, and quite a few guys.

I noticed them like dancing, and then like constantly eyeballing the cute girl next to them, like trying to get their attention, or trying to start an awkward conversation where the girl talks for a few minutes, and then leaves to go say hi to our friends or something, right? And I was just noticing this all around me, and instead of replicating what everyone else was doing with failure, what I started doing again was building a sense of community and invitation all around me. And I just started with my own vibe. And am I enjoying myself? Am I having a good time? Hey, there's a guy dancing next to me. Like, let's start making like funny faces and like kind of dancing off one another, right? And spreading this energy, especially with the acquaintances or the people I had run into before, kind of goofing around, having fun, having the sense of community all around me. And then the women around you, right? They start to notice this, and instead of sniping for the one beautiful cute girl that you're kind of into, it's like, hey.

like if you see a woman, woman kind of like having fun and giving you eyes, like dance with her, dance with someone else, start conversations all around you, and all of a sudden everyone feels this invitation, this openness, this warmness from you, where it's not like you're some in the dark, like trying to take something. The bottom line is, people pick up on energy, especially women, and the best way to create that social charge, that social magnetism, is to pick the low-hanging fruit all around you, to start engaging and having a good time, and genuinely having fun. In your experience, people sense this and it lowers their guard. Right, instead of being the creepy guy, like coming to take something, it's more about what you can give, what is your vibe that you're giving off, and how can you create more joy and connection with everyone around you. If you come from that place, it really lowers the nerves of approaching anyone, and it also lowers other people's guards towards you. This is the secret sauce. So, continuing on with

creating sense of community when I'm at the gym. The easiest way to meet another guy is to ask them for a spot. Hey, will you spot me on the bench press? And I don't just ask anyone. I ask who I'm interested in, like some guy who's doing cool handstands or something, like, Who's dope? Like, let's hang out. Let's hang out for a little bit. Can you spot me? Or I'll ask to work in on the squat racks, right? And you know, just start a small conversation. And it's amazing how, like, planting these seeds can grow a sense of community. I go to the gym almost every day. I know half the people in there, feels like, who are my age. And so I'm just asking for spots, and then all of a sudden, like, you have a little bit of a connection with a couple guys there. And I'm in the back corner in the squat racks, and I'm challenging these guys to one-arm hang competitions, and we're just like laughing, we're having a

good time. We're getting to know each other, we're creating a sense of community in the back. And guess what, there's a few women around as well, and these women sense like hey, these guys are like literally just having fun. I start like inviting them in, like hey, what's your name, you want to try, like you two should challenge each other, right? And yeah, it can be awkward at times, but ultimately creating this vibe, creating the sense of community and openness around you makes everyone, it drops their guards down, it makes them a lot more interested and open to you. And they're also like, who is this guy who seems to be making friends so easily, there's something there's something magnetic about him, there's something charismatic about him. And just from that one interaction of challenge everyone to one arm hang competitions, I met three different girls. Right now, here's the second key, is I didn't ask for any of their numbers, okay? And this is the difference between hitting and approaching a girl, hitting on a girl and approaching a girl. I didn't ask for any.

of their numbers. I asked for their name, right? And then we had a little bit of fun, and then I left. Why? Because I know I'm going to see them again. I know I'm going to see them at the gym again or at that coffee shop. Like, if I've seen them repeatedly, I'm not going to be over the top up front right away. What we're going to do is we're going to create rapport, we're going to create trust, and just by having a really brief interaction, Hey, what's your name, right? Even doing that to a girl maybe who isn't a warm lead necessarily, but Hey, what's your name, right? Get to know her just a tad. The next time you see her, you be like, Hey, Bren, how's it going? How's your day going today? And you can create more rapport that way. Now, to recap step two here, which is creating community approach, is not about what you can get, it's about what you can give. Okay, there's so many lonely people in

this world who just want to get a Hello who want to get a smile who want to have a conversation and and it's about creating an openness a container of authenticity where you can have fun and invite people to join you and from this space it's way easier to say hello to a girl to say hello to someone it feels way more natural and effortless and when you do that you can either have a longer conversation or keep it really short and honestly the shorter the better in so many so many situations especially with women if you're going to see them again now let's get into step three which is hitting on women if I walk past a girl in the streets or I'm at the gym or I'm at the grocery store I'm like dang I may never see this beautiful woman again don't miss the shot right how I take that shot generally is hey I think you're beautiful right what's your name and if she responds with a smile and be like yo my name is Sally what's

yours right. I know I have a door. The key to going through this door is not to engage in small talk. This is a huge differentiation between approach and hitting on somebody. If you are only hitting on someone, don't engage in small talk. It's honestly low-value behavior. Hey, I think you're beautiful. What's your name? *Smiles* I'm Sally. What's yours? I'm Christian. Hey, I would like to get to know you just a little bit more. Would you like to take a walk with me or grab a coffee sometime? Yes. What's your Instagram or number? No, cool. I'll see you around. Right, and this thing is, it's honestly easier not having small talk. Small talk can always feel awkward and forced and weird if it's like a really brief interaction, like we're grabbing oranges from the same basket. You don't want to be like, Hey, like how's the weather? It's like, no, like you are very direct, you are very clear about it, and you keep it short. That way the nerves aren't overwhelming. I tend

to hit on girls very rarely, and it's only when I do find them very attractive, and you know I like their energy. I like their vibe. I like their style, and I probably won't see them again, right? If those three factors come together, then I have to approach, and I have to give them hit on them, and sometimes hitting can turn into an approach in the sense of like actually she seems really cool, and we start having an easy, effortless conversation. Like let's continue that, right? In conclusion, my friends, just start saying hello to people, put yourself out there in the right situations, talk about what you're doing, or give a compliment, and start a conversation. The more you can do this, the better you'll get at it, and the more your social wealth will grow. Hey, before you go, there I got two things for you. Number one, if you're a young man, I'm looking for you. I'm looking to create a men's group that is focused on the pursuit of excellence and on bettering ourselves together. If you're interested

in doing weekly calls with me workshops from my book, and having Mastermind masterminds with other brothers. There's a link in the description where you can apply for a free Discovery call with me. Secondly, check out this playlist over here for my most recent upload on personal development. I'll see you over there. Peace.

I approached 500 Strangers. Here's what I learned

Wisdom Warriors

The Power of Approaching People in Building Social Capital

A recent study shows that a significant percentage of young men have never approached women, highlighting a missed opportunity to build crucial social capital.

The act of approaching strangers can lead to life-changing connections, including friendships, mentors, and business relationships.

Building social wealth through approaching people is based on courage and authenticity, rather than external factors like looks or status.

Tips for Natural and Successful Approaches to Meeting People

Approaching people is a practice of courage, not focused on the outcome but on starting a conversation and building confidence.

The best places to meet people include coffee shops, gyms, athletic events, dance classes, and bars, where you can also build a sense of community.

The secret to approaching anyone, especially women, is to find a common interest or activity to start a conversation and build a connection.

Building a sense of community and inclusion can make approaching others feel effortless.

Creating a positive and inviting energy can make people feel safe and included in a social setting.

Instead of following the traditional approach of trying to get someone's attention, focusing on enjoying oneself and building a sense of community around can be more effective in social interactions.

Creating Social Magnetism and Community at the Gym

Creating a warm and inviting energy can lower people's guard and make it easier to connect with them, especially at the gym.

Asking for a spot or starting a conversation with someone you're interested in can help build a sense of community and connection with others.

By focusing on having fun and creating a welcoming environment, it's possible to naturally attract and connect with people, without the need to actively pursue or ask for their contact information.

Creating rapport and trust is important before making a move when approaching women.

The focus should be on building a community and offering value rather than just trying to get something.

When making a move, it's important to be direct and avoid small talk, keeping the interaction short and to the point.

Approaching women is a rare occurrence, only when highly attractive and with a great energy, vibe, and style.

The approach can lead to effortless conversations, but the key is to start by saying hello, putting yourself out there, and initiating a conversation.