Find of Lonesome back here. I forgot my ammo bag, should return back. No, no time. 9, 10, 11, 12 bullets or...

bust right here. Maximum effort [__] shot. Rich Corinthian leather. I'm looking for Francis. Have you

seen this man? Weather ow, ow. Yane [Music] [Applause] Yane [__] yet? Did I leave the stove

on? Now, breaking news: a multi-car collision turns into shots fired on the Cross Town Expressway this morning. Gridlock

has kept police from the scene. The assailant appears to be armed, dangerous, and wearing a red

suit. Dead NEOS. Sonic, come. We have a mission. Wait, you may be wondering why the red suit? Well, that's so bad guys can't see

me bleed. This guy's got the right idea; he wore brown pants. Fine, I only have 12 bullets, so

you're going to have to share. Let's count them down: 10 [__] 9, 8,

[__] Bad Deadpool. Savage. Good Deadpool. Someone's not counting. 6 [Music]

5, 4. Gotcha. Right up Main Street. 3, 2. Stup—it's worth it! [Music] Francis!

Francis! What the [__] biscuit? Where you at, Francis? You're probably thinking my boyfriend

said this was a superhero movie, but that guy in the red suit just turned that other guy into a [__] kebab. Well, I

may be super, but I am no hero. And yeah, technically this is a murder, but some of the best love stories start with a

murder. And that's exactly what this is: a love story. And to tell it right, I've got to

take you back to long before I squeezed this ass into red spandex. Perfect. You're clowning. People react to

News of late-stage cancer hits differently. There are certainly options we can look into. New drugs are being developed every

day. So what do we do? Surely there is something we can do. Vanessa's already working on plan A, B, all the way through

Z.  I'm memorizing the details of her face like it's the first time I'm seeing

it, or the last. [Music] Ah, hush falls over the crowd as rookie sensation Wade Wilson, out of Regina,

Saskatchewan, lines up the shot. Form looks good. Oh, and that's why Regina crimes with fun ladies and gentlemen. What

you're witnessing is Sweet Dick kicking revenge. Oh, give in to the business; incoming! This is taking sportsmanlike

conduct to a whole new level. Looking good, Francis. Well-rested, like you've been pitching, not catching. Ringing any bells?

No? How about now, Wade Wilson? Yeah. And whose fault is that, huh, Francis? Yeah, time to undo

what you did to this butterface. Please, you should thank me. Apparently, I made you immortal. I'm actually quite jealous.

Yeah, but this ain't a life worth living, is it now? I'm about to do to you what Limp

Biscuit did to music in the late '90s. Dad is... and uh, that guy over there came in

looking for you. Real Grim Reaper type. Mr. Wilson, how can I help you? I understand you've recently been

diagnosed with terminal cancer. Stalker alert! It's my job. Recruitment, but you're a fighter. Special Forces, 41 confirmed

kills; one every 7 weeks. Same rate most folks get a haircut. I represent an organization that may be able to

help. What if I told you we can cure your cancer, and what's more, give you abilities most men only dream

Of we won't just make you better, we will make you better than better, a superhero. The worst part about cancer

isn't what it does to you, but what it does to the people you love. Who knew if

this guy could save my life, but I knew there was only one way that I could save hers. Okay, let's pro/con this superhero

thing. Pro: They pull down a gaggle of ass local dry cleaning discounts, lucrative film deals, both origin stories and

larger ensemble team movies. Con: They're all lame-ass teacher's pets. You know, I can hear you.

I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to them. Stay right here. You've been warned before. Deadpool, this is a shameful and reckless use of your

powers. You will both be coming with us. Look, Colossus, I don't have time for the goody-two-shoes [nonsense] right now, and

you are Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Negasonic Teenage what the [heck]? That's the coolest

name ever. So what, you're like, uh, his sidekick? No, please. Come quiet, you big chrome [dweeb].

Gobler, that's not nice. You really going to [mess] this up for me? Wait, you're

better than this. Join us. Use your powers for good. Heads up, be a superhero. Listen, either that or I slap the [crap] out of you.

Wait, hey, zip it, grenade. Hey, douche, and I hope you're [Music] watching. Quite unfortunate that does

it. Oh, Canada. That's not good. Wait, please [don't] shoot. Oh, you're poor wife. You really

should stop. All the dinosaurs feared the T-Rex. My promise, this gets worse for you, big boy. This is embarrassing. Please stay

down. You ever hear the one-legged man in the ass-kicking contest? Let us go talk to the professor.

Makarov or Stewart, these timelines are so confusing. Oh, you'll recover, way you always do. You ever see 127 Hours? Spoiler alert!

Oh my God, nasty! Oh, there's the money shot, baby! Rock bottom. When life ends up...

breathtakingly [unintelligible], you can generally trace it back to one big bad decision,

the one that sent you down the road to Shitsburgh. We have another tool I'm just excited about. My first day of superhero

camp. Shut the [expletive] up! This workshop is not a government-led program, but I'm

about to hurt you. Wait, I was a patient here once myself. You know, the treatment affects everyone differently. It made

me angel and humanly strong. In my case, it enhanced my reflexes, also scorched my nerve endings so

I no longer feel pain. This is how it's going to work: adrenaline acts as a catalyst for the serum, so we're going to

have to make you suffer. If you're lucky, the Ming genes will activate and manifest in spectacular

fashion. If not, well, we'll have to keep on hurting you in new and different ways, each more

painful than the last until you finally mutate. If this doesn't unlock your mutation, then well, nothing will. Now what

we're going to do is lower the oxygen concentration in the air to the exact point you feel like you're

suffocating. What secret, Wade? This workshop doesn't make superheroes; we make super slaves. We're going to fit you with a

control collar and auction you off to the highest bidder. Who knows what they'll have you doing? You're never going home after this.

Until your wicked back up. [Music] Weekend. Did I say this was a love story? No, it's a horror movie.

Looks like someone lost his shot at Homecoming King. What have you done to me? I've really raised your stress levels high

enough to trigger a mutation. He's sadistic! I've cured you, Wade. Your mutated cells can heal

anything. It's attacking your cancer as fast as it can form. Yeah, I've seen similar side effects before. I could

them. That was fun in there. Now I'm going to shut you in again. Wait, not because I need to, because I want

to. Oh, you smelling sh*t? It's all right. It's all right. [Music] I didn't just get the cure to L cancer; I

got the cure to L everything. But there was only one thing that really mattered. No way! I'm not making her life

as ugly as mine. Come on, Wade, it can't be that bad. I'm a monster

inside now. I belong in a freak show circus! Wait, Vanessa loves you. She doesn't care what you look...

what you see in him? No, you look like an avocado had sex with an older, more disgusting avocado. Yeah, not gently, like

it was hate sex! And the only guy who can fix this fugly mug is the British

scientist who ran the mutant factory, and he's gone poof! I'm going to work

through his crew until somebody gives up. Francis, force him to fix this, then put a bullet in his skull and blow out the brain

hole. I don't want to see that or think of it again, but the douchebag does think you're dead, right? Yeah, that's good. You

should keep it that way. What, like...like wear a mask? Yes, a very thick mask all the time. All you need now is a suit and

a nickname, like Wade the Wisecracker, or Scared Devil, Mr. Never Die. Oh, sh*t! What...

Put all my money on you, and now I just realized I'm never going to win the uh, Deadpool.

Captain Deadpool? No, just Deadpool. Yeah.  Selzer water and lemon for blood, or we're red...dumb.

Ass-Captain, tell me where your boss is, or you're going to die in 5...

[Music] minutes. Sexy motherf***er. Don't hesitate to go. Nice to see you, Jared. I'll take a footlong, fully

loaded. 41 confirmed kills. Now it's 89, about to be 90, Mr. Wilson. Ding ding.

You're looking very alive. Only on the outside. This is not going to end well for me...is not going to end well for you.

No, where's your boss? I can tell you exactly what...Oh, you'll tell me, but first you

might want to look away for this. Now, this little piggy went to...Thank you, Agent Smith.  They're all caught

up. King Wade Wilson. Suppose I'd wear a mask too if I had a face like that. I wish I healed

this fast still. We'll put him out of our misery on our terms, right? And when he heals...he can't...no, if there's nothing

left of him to heal...Vanessa. Someone's asking for you. Something about her old boyfriend. I knew it was

you. You have Wade Wilson to thank for this. I've been trying to tell you...you've got the wrong girl. My

old boyfriend? He's dead. See? I thought that too, but he keeps on coming back like a cockroach.

Ripley from Alien 3...You're old. Wait, is that you? Yeah, it's me,

Deadpool. And I got an offer you can't refuse. I'm going to wait out here, okay.

It's a big house. It's funny that I only ever see two of you. It's almost like the

studio couldn't afford another X-Men. So, any luck winning G back?

I tried to hold on tight, Mr. Poe, but Buu is more

What was that? Uh, that was Buu in... in the trunk?

B: Who? My romantic rival, Buu? Who's tied up in

the trunk? I'm... I'm doing as you said, D. I plan to gut him like a tandoori fish, then

I did not tell him to do that! Absolutely not!

곧 3편 개봉을 앞둔 마블의 악동 히어로! 데드풀 1~2편 한번에 몰아보기!!(재업)

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